27 July - Wishing God Didn't Trust Us So Much

Today I'm reminded of a quote that my cousin Andres included in one of his emails to me:

"I know God will not give me anything I can't handle... I just wish that He didn't trust me so much."

This morning we were told that pathology tests on Sarah's removed breast tissue showed cancer cells at the margins and in all 16 lymph nodes taken out. This means that the tumor had penetrated in to surrounding tissues adjacent to the breast.
So, Sarah will now be doing radiation treatment next in order to try & clean up the chest area as soon as her incision has healed up enough (in approx. 4 weeks). In the mean time she has started Tamoxifen right away today and will start Herceptin asap as well (2-3 weeks). She'll drop Tamox during radiation since it interferes.

Mother Gwynne, the Asst. Rector at our church, brought by a little angel today which I found inspirational & wanted to share. On its wing it says "Miracles Happen." To me, the outstretched arms of the angel seem to invite us into a comforting embrace, while at the same time encouraging us to let our spirits soar and fly free no matter what challenges we face in our physical lives. I do expect miracles - not sure what form they will take, but I trust they'll be just what we need. I'm praying for both physical healing as well as emotional/spiritual healing that lets love and hope displace fear and hurt in us as we face the future.

I just wish He didn't trust us so much...

26 July - Sarah's Back Home

Sarah finally got to come home from the hospital today! She's feeling pretty good, although we still have to make sure her red blood cell count comes back up into the normal range. The loose shirt is hiding two very uncomfortable drain tubes that keep fluid from building up at the surgery site. We're going back to see both Sarah's oncologist and surgeon tomorrow - could be that the drain tubes can already be removed, otherwise it'll be after the weekend.

Also, here's Ben - the proud T-baller after his last game this season. He really seemed to have fun playing! And... what kid can resist the fun of kicking up that ballfield dirt? :)

25 July - Post Surgery

Well, it's done... Sarah's mastectomy went according to plan and she's recovering fine. Wow, what a trooper this woman is! Despite her smile in this pic, Sarah's pretty exhausted and it looks like she's likely to spend a second night in the hospital. Her blood pressure got back to normal by morning, but her red blood cell count is still pretty low (guess you lose a fair amount of blood in this type of surgery). Overall, I think Sarah is relieved to have this step behind her and in fairly good spirits. No post-anesthesia nausea, which was also a big relief! :) I spent last night with Sarah in the hospital (yes, managed to sleep in the visitor's chair) and will try to spend the night there again today if she doesn't get a room mate.

21 July - Time for Surgery

We've had a change in plans and Sarah's oncologist has recommended she get a mastectomy asap - it's scheduled for next Monday, 24 July. This was prompted by suspicion that the primary tumor was not responding to the chemotherapy (Adriamycin and Cytoxan) and in fact getting bigger. Sarah had another breast ultrasound this past Wednesday and although not completely conclusive, it did show a larger mass that is likely active tumor.

So, the plan is to stop the current chemo, remove the primary tumor, and then get her on Herceptin (which her tumor should respond to due to the HER2/NEU+++ attribute) possibly along with Taxol (a chemo drug) a few weeks after the surgery. My parents will be here for 2 weeks to help with Sam & Ben while Sarah recovers.

10 July - Second Opinion

Switching to a new format so less scrolling is needed to view entries. Here's a picture of Sarah and Sam taking in the Soccer World Cup final on Sunday. Was a long game, so neither saw the penalty kick finale... Sam went down for his nap & Sarah ended up napping, as well! Sarah's nausea is finally tapered after 7 days - this 3rd chemo was a doozy for side-effects.

Well, the trip downtown to Rush University Hospital Cancer Center to get a second opinion went fine. Although the doctor had a few new thoughts for us, her opinion (along with the ones from doctors at Duke and Johns Hopkins) have lead us to the overall conclusion that we seem to be getting excellent medical care for Sarah under her current oncologist. And, the treatment plan she's on seems like the best we can do based on the latest studies and standards of care. So, she'll do a mastectomy probably after one more round of chemo and then begin a long term treatment with Herceptin (slows/inhibits tumor growth), Zometa (bone strengthener) and maybe low-dose Taxol (chemo agent) to keep the bone metastasis at bay. Still no way to know what the future holds, but we remain positive & hopeful and look forward to many more years as a family together. We're very thankful for all the prayers & please keep 'em coming!

Well, Sarah's still trudging through the side effects of chemo & the blood cell stimulant shot (flu-like side effects), but we got the blood tumor marker results and they seemed to be encouraging. We still need to see what the doctors say about it, but one marker did go down & the other one stayed approx the same but is already in the "normal" range for someone without cancer. Seems like these days every week brings new ups or downs. Now we're looking ahead to getting a second opinion on Monday from a doctor specializing in breast cancer at Rush University Medical Center in downtown Chicago. Ben will be jealous that he doesn't get to go -- he'll miss a chance to ride the train in to town. :)

4 July - Another Week 1

Well, our Oncologist recommended doing the chemo & seeing what blood tumor marker levels told us later this week. So, we're starting another "week 1" in Sarah's 3 week chemo cycle. Here's a picture of Sarah surfing on day before chemo & then getting treatment #3 on 3 July. Our Independence Day celebrations will be pretty laid back. The new anti-nausea drug has not done much yet to prevent Sarah's chemo nausea which hit her full force last night - hopefully it will not linger any longer than last time (~ 4 days).

2 July Update

Day before a big day for us. Sarah gets her third round of chemo tomorrow, we think. But, the tumor in her right breast doesn't seem to be getting much smaller despite the two previous chemos, so we'll be deciding tomorrow with our oncologist on whether to continue chemo or do the mastectomy right away & get Sarah on the hormone and antibody drugs that should hopefully dramatically slow the growth of Sarah's cancer cells. If Sarah does get chemo, she might have less nausea this time due to moving to the latest anti-nausea drug called Emend. So, tomorrow we'll see how the rest of this week will unfold - chemo yuck-week or surgery.